margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
