I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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