uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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