i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize