It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Randomize
