ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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