Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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