I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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