Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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