Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
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