So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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