We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
