If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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