I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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