office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
