Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
