he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
