I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
