Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize
