no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Randomize
