This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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