Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize