Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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