It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
