Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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