Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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