I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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