I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
