is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
