I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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