Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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