oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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