waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
