She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
