The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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