I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Drake has all the answers
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Randomize
