It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Randomize
