I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
