No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
