i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
