Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize