she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize