I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
