Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
