If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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