Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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