Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Randomize
