I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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