i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
