love makes seman taste better
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Randomize
