and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
